Tuesday, February 9, 2010

8 Years ago today .....

It was the first day of the 2002 Salt Lake Winter Olympics. I woke up to some strange feelings and told myself to go back to sleep (it was 5am) but every 15 minutes I woke up with the same thing. Around 8am I got up and had breakfast, had a shower and tried to do some normal puttering around. As I moved around it became clearer as the pain got stronger and closer together that this was it. I sat around watching slalom skiing and speed skating, trying to take my mind off things. Funny what we first time moms think, like ANYTHING could have taken my mind off what was about to happen! Around 3pm I finally caved to my parents and Dallin and left to go to the hospital, just to "check things out" and see if this was it. *I* knew it was but I guess you never really know ....
They told me, of course, that it was indeed time and that we would not be leaving again. They told me to walk the halls and get something to eat since I would not be doing that later and would need some strength. Things moved SLOWLY and painfully along and they decided they need to give me a push, in the form of repturing my water. Scared out of my mind at this point of what was about to happen to me I panicked and asked for an epidural. I didn't really need one at that point but was terrified that I would want one later and would not be able to get one (after now having done two natural births I think I made the right choice for my first time!). The epidural was fabulous and all feeling was completely replaced by NUMB - blissful ignorance of what was taking place. One hour after they told me it was time for her to come out, she appeared. 11:59 pm, one minute before her due date. I am sure that was the only time in her life she was early!
Dallin shouted that it was a girl and from outside my door I heard my mom scream "It's a GIRL" to my father, who was sitting down the hall. She was purple and needed some coaxing and attention from pediatric specialists to breathe properly but she did fine and perked right back up. She was tiny, a 6lb 5oz 20 inch bundle of sweetness unlike any I had ever seen. She looked at me with big blue eyes and I knew my heart was gone forever. I was terrified out of my mind but just the sight of her sent my heart fluttering and I was filled with pride and love. She was MINE!
Now, 8 years later I look at this girl, who is quickly moving towards being a young lady, with wonder and awe. She is going to be baptized this weekend. How did this happen? Where did the time go? Have I taught her enough? Have I been a good mother? Does she know just how much I still love her every time I look at her? That I am still filled with the same pride and joy? I hope so ......

Happy Birthday, baby girl, Happy Birthday.

1 comment:

  1. that was a great post Tami! It made me cry, Dallin shouting, your mom shouting and little Emma looking at her mama.
    I plan on coming for her big day. I have strep so we'll see how I feel but I'd really hate to miss it!